A wise man once told me not to argue with fools/'Cause from afar people can't tell who is who-Jay-Z

So a while back, I had to rebuke somebody in the way he was living his life. Why? 'Cause that's what I felt the Holy Spirit was moving me to do. I think I felt the conviction from the Holy Spirit to say something because I was just disgusted at the sin that was living in this person. Not to say that Christians won't sin, but this person's embrace of sin, of "that's just the way it is/ can't beat it/God will forgive me so I'll do it anyways" attitude just filled me with the zeal to have to say something. I would know of non-Christians that would act more "Christian-like" than this individual, and I feel this individual is making a mockery out of the Lord's kingdom. The Lord of the universe does not need me to protect his good name, He can do it himself and will judge accordingly when time comes. But that's not to say that the Lord didn't use me in this case to remind this individual of God's judgment. I do this all out of love.

I was aware that things get screwed up when the Spirit is at work, and I agree that it works for the greater good. It stirs up what people think, people reflect on themselves, and the truth is laid out on the table. Why do things get screwed up? 'Cause often the truth hurts...people really aren't happy or willing to take it. And this is what happened in this case.

This particular person feels that I shouldn't have rebuked him, reason being I didn't know him well enough. That is, if I would have known him better, I would see things differently and not have said those things. I however would disagree with this. I would say I know him better than most, and being someone that's already somewhat closer to him and knowing of the good in him, yet still seeing him as I do, think of how the general public would see this person when they don't know him. If there were a person like this, wouldn't you prefer he not say he's a Christian and mess up the image of Christianity, or clean up his act for the sake of others?

I have spoken to many Christian brothers regarding the issue, and we have agreed that what I did wasn't wrong. However, my delivery of what I said MAY not have been the best way, I'm not sure because my actions hasn't produced any apparent fruit yet. I even apologized to that person afterwards about making him upset from the way I spoke to him. (Not that making someone upset is a bad thing). I did this because it is scriptural to build up your brother after you rebuke him and make peace. So after this we were cool......until last night.

So he brings it up again, "how I don't know him well enough to say things to judge him, that I don't make a great enough effort to get to know him better or care about him". Whereas in fact I probably speak to him more than most people in the fellowship, or even members of my house. Though this may be little, (which isn't even true) it is really relative to how much I speak to others. I mean, if I don't speak much in the first place, wouldn't you say that saying a few things to this person shows that I care a lot.

This is however not good enough for him, that my knowing of him is not good enough to consider us friends or that I care. Which doesn't even make sense because he considered us friends before I rebuked him, yet I speak to him/treat him now the same as before, but in his eyes we're not friends now. So out of his frustration, he says "fine, I'll just care at your level now and not talk to you". This is however not for me to deal with, it is in fact this individual that has chosen to reduce his effort for friendship, and I'm okay with this. What really frustrates me though, is that my housemates don't see how I am able to find peace in the rebukee's decision to not talk to me anymore. They keep urging me to pursue this friendship, that I should go beyond my current level or caring while they wouldn't in fact do it themselves in the examples that I gave them.

I think the rebukee just wants me to see that there is good in him, which I do see. The good however does not cancel out the sin I see in his life that needs rebuking. I feel he really just wants my consent on how he lives his life is really not that bad, which is something I cannot do.

Personally, I don't treasure friendship as much as many other people do, especially the rebukee in this case. People have let me down time after time, and it's just something I don't care about as much as others. Nowhere is it biblical that friendships are super important, but rather Christians will have it bad and be hated by many. Jesus did not come to earth to make friends, but to love and save the people. So I really have no interest in his friendship, (which in my eyes we do have) but rather his salvation and his Christian walk. And don't get me wrong, I do enjoy hanging out with friends, but with what I know now, I don't think I can put it above the spiritual well-being of somebody.

So the question is....should I make an even greater, well beyond my normal level of showing friendship to this individual so that in his eyes, what I present is love? Or should I just have peace with it (which is what Roger suggested), put it in the hands of the Lord of how this individual feels and move on? I'm going with option #2 right now, I feel it would do this person good to not always have everything his way. If this is what our friendship boils down to, that his efforts to be-friend me came with the want of something in return, I'm not sure I want it either. I feel like I'm dealing with kids at times. Damn!